I have it on the best authority – someone who actually speaks for God – that tight pants and trousers offend God. Maybe He can’t remember what He supposedly put under there, and maybe takes offense if a reminder is made public, but seriously folks, don’t get angry about the new rule: it’s even gender neutral, for crying out loud! How modern, liberal, and secular is that? Besides, maybe these people at the northern tip of Indonesia justifiably feel the need to work a little harder doing whatever they can to keep God’s wrath in the form of natural disasters at bay for a while. Can’t say I blame them.
“What’s prohibited are tight trousers and jeans. If there are parties who disagree, don’t be angry with me. Be angry with God as I’m only carrying out a religious obligation.”
Still don’t believe me? Then read the article here.